A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing

As a Man as well as a Stay-At-Home Dad I struggle with the reality that I am grossly outnumbered. Even though there’s zero hostility between myself and my female counterparts I have to wonder what they really think of me at the playground, pushing the stroller at the mall and at the toddler class I take Maddie to every Friday. I am highly proud and confident in the role I play now and still look forward to spending every second with my daughter but part of me ponders what the ladies and other moms think of me. Do they think I’m lazy for not working? Do they think our family is mega-rich in that I don’t need to work? Do they think I’m inferior and emasculated in society and at home? Can they possibly think I’m gay and my husband is working? Well whatever they think it really doesn’t matter much and truth be told I don’t think those things at all. I actually carry myself with a greater purpose and responsibility than that and almost with an air of superiority in that I can handle this child-raising thing better than some of my female counterparts. I hate for that last statement to sound misogynistic and that is not my intent. I mean it to sound like how minorities (and lets face it, I’m a minority in this regard) have a greater feeling of pride for what they are whether they be Black, Hispanic, Gay or Handicap. But this is not my main thesis for this particular blog post.

As I said I am a Man and a very hot-blooded one at that (check it and see 😉 and the thing I wonder most when I’m around the other moms and ladies with kids is do they think I’m attractive as a SAHD. I don’t see myself as hot but a mildly attractive guy that is more or less pleasant to look at it. Not putting myself down but I’m not that confident. However, as a confident SAHD does this make me more attractive to the moms on the playground? Or to the lady shopping at the mall as I share a lunch with Maddie at the male. Maddie, as a cute kid herself, is a chick-magnet but am I also getting some added looks because of her? I’m not really fantasizing nor am I “looking” for this unknown attention but with the whole “role-reversal” that I’m in does this somewhat automatically make me more appealing?

However, I also theorize that this could also have a polar effect on my SAHD role. The ladies could see me as a threat or even as a pervert; a somewhat sexual enigma to them. They might think I’m staring at them or lusting after them as I make sure Maddie doesn’t fall off the jungle gym. I must admit I do take peeks from time to time (it’s inevitable by nature, don’t you dare judge) to see an attractive mom at the playground. I’ve seen my fair share of cleavage, whale-tails and even ass crack either in toddler class or the park. Today’s fashion doesn’t leave as much to the imagination as it used to. And wrangling a kid leaves a woman more susceptible to leering, sorry to say. Sometimes I’m not even looking and it’s just there for everyone to see. I try best to be a perfect gentleman and give my female counterparts as much respect as I can in regards to this but as a man I sometimes can’t help it. But like I said I wonder if a woman at the playground worries more that I’m there to be a perfect lady and not show more than they should. They might’ve dressed fine or comfortable for the park where 98% of the other people there on a Thursday afternoon are other fellow women. But I get there and they get all nervous.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m just being very honest here. I consider myself a very nice, civil and even courteous man especially to my fellow ladies. I love, adore and crave my wife on a unfathomable level and she’s always my number one lady. But Maddie is also my number one and I realize I have an added responsibility to her to show how much of a gentleman I can be and to show as much respect and chivalry to women as they deserve. Because after-all I will always be her number one man.